2022 CMAs Red Carpet: Katy Perry Wears Stupid Denim Jumpsuit With Giant Bow, Etc.

Co-hosts Peyton Manning and Luke Bryan made a bunch of cheesy jokes about country music and football, and Maren Morris showed up late on purpose.

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This week, nestled between the “Red Wave” that never was and the Mar-a-Lago wedding that might never be, was country music’s self-proclaimed “biggest night:” The Country Music Awards.

The looks were underwhelming, the performances fine, and the politics—despite the number of controversies swirling the industry for the last few months—were non-existent.

Katy Perry and Thomas Rhett performed their duet, “Where We Started.” Luke Bryan, who co-hosted with Peyton Manning and has been trying to defend his dumb decision to bring Ron DeSantis on stage during a recent concert, avoided joking about the situation, beyond Manning saying that he and Carrie Underwood are “both worried about what Luke Bryan might say tonight.” Spoiler: He said nothing about the controversy and also nothing funny, interesting, or worth including a YouTube link.

Maren Morris also skipped the red carpet after saying in September she might skip the show due to her ongoing feud with Jason and Brittany Aldean, in which she called Brittany “Insurrection Barbie” for having made harmful, transphobic comments. Morris did show up just in time for the Album of the Year announcement, gave winner Luke Combs a standing ovation, and then left.

So that’s that! Here are the looks.

Carrie Underwood

Carrie Underwood
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There is something very oceanic to this gown. I feel like it wants to be ethereal, but it tried too hard and instead makes Underwood look like she emerged from the waves of a fabric scraps dumpster.

It also looks very similar to Zendaya’s dress at the Met Ball in 2019—except without all the carbon fiber rods and LED lights that actually made the latter dress interesting.

Reba

Reba
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This is the exact same expression I had when my editor asked me if I knew that the Country Music Awards were last night.

Miranda Lambert

Miranda Lambert
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It brings me no pleasure to dislike anything Miranda Lambert does. But this looks like the Macy’s dress every 8th grader wore to their end-of-middle-school formal in 2002. Similar to grinding to “Ignition” in the school’s gymnasium, some things are best left resting inside the subconscious folds of the cringe-worthy memories of being 13.

Michael Shannon and Jessica Chastain?

Michael Shannon and Jessica Chastain?
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Here are two celebrities goofing around and having a nice time—and two assistants/interns/entry-level entertainment business hopefuls who look a little stressed and like they might shit their pants, since their boss probably told them to make sure the celebrities “never notice you.”

Kelsea Ballerini

Kelsea Ballerini
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Once a trend—in this case, the Balenciaga/Kim Kardashian full-body glove thing—has trickled down to a country music red carpet, then its job is done. It may retire, relax, and spend its old age hanging out in all the basement trunks and vintage stores it wants.

Katy Perry

Katy Perry
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This ensemble is proof that voting for Rick Caruso—the anti-choice Los Angeles mayoral candidate—is harmful to your health, your community, and your taste in clothing.

Eric Decker and Jessie James Decker

Eric Decker and Jessie James Decker
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Wearing a red dress on the red carpet—no matter how Marilyn Monroe you’re trying to be—just makes you look like a giant pimple that can’t be popped.

Thomas Rhett and Lauren Akins

Thomas Rhett and Lauren Akins
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A country couple that isn’t Jason and Brittany Aldean! Great! Good for them! Love the metallic green.

Elle King

Elle King
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I’ve never been a fan of burnt orange, but holy shit if this dress isn’t inspiring me to kick every other color of the rainbow to the curb and make a spontaneous appointment to get a neck tatt.

Little Big Town

Little Big Town
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Every group of friends needs a leader, a star, a Regina George if you will. It appears no one in Little Big Town is in disagreement that Karen Fairchild (bright orange, lace, mermaid dress with feather trim) is their George. With absolutely zero knowledge of the group dynamic, I’ll guess Kimberly Schlapman is the Karen, Jimi Westbrook (far left) is the Cady, and Philip Sweet is absolutely giving me an expression that says he’s desperate to make “fetch” happen.

Wynonna Judd

Wynonna Judd
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Wynonna Judd can do no wrong. And after the year she’s had, she gets nothing but props for even attending a red carpet event, let alone looking as stunning as she does in this glittery gold number.

Sarah Drew

Sarah Drew
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A cape! Magical, whimsical, exciting, fun, etc., etc. The Grey’s Anatomy star has diagnosed me with a case of loving this look!

Bonus!

Bonus!
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Underwood, Reba, and Lambert performed a Loretta Lynn tribute wearing the most exciting fits of the entire night. Bright colors, lots of sequins, plenty of tassels, and flashy cowboy boots. Country music need not give us anything else.

 
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