Christina Aguilera Gets a Breast Reduction from the Surgeons at Lucky

But this cover makes The Voice star look like a B cup. There’s no cleavage, and if her boobs were pushed to the sides — been there, done that — they’re sure not bulging into the armpit territory, as one would expect (and as the laws of physics demand). In addition, the sides of the shirt have been mysteriously nipped in. Our old friend Photoshop! (Or, as Michelle Visage calls it, “The Airbrush Diet.”)

Of course, we treat cleavage very strangely in this culture; it’s considered inappropriate in the workplace, and so super duper sexy that politicians have it removed from photos or get in trouble for exposing it. Southwest Airlines won’t tolerate it. But those of us packing a sizeable rack know it can be difficult to hide. A scoopneck top is both friend and enemy: Comfortable, but more likely to lead some people believe that you’re slutty, thinking about sex, showing off, or inviting comments. On a men’s magazine, the cleavage would stay, obviously. But for a friendly ladymag like Lucky, when your cups runneth over, you’d better camouflage them, it seems. A quick survey of covers shows that ladies with smaller breasts can show a lot of chest skin, while larger-breasted women are covered and minimized.

In any case, judging by a pic from July 4th (in the center), and a pic from April 3 (on the right), it sure looks like Lucky took things down a notch in the chesticle area. Pretty funny that the cover claims Christina “embraces” her curves, while also screaming, “PERFECT YOUR SHAPE!” In other words, make your giant tits look smaller, Jeez.

[Daily Mail, The Wow Report]