There are few things more embarrassing than being asked to hold someone else’s baby only to have that baby immediately explode into hysterics. Chalk it up to the widely accepted notion that small children — like dogs and horses and Jedi — somehow possess an extrasensory level of bullshit detection lost to normal adult humans; the sort of person who is universally unpalatable to babies is the sort of person who might be soul-impoverished. So it’s with a heart heavy with schadenfreude that I report to you that the GOP’s Presidential nominee has met several of America’s babies, and the verdict is in: Mitt Romney will not be winning the Baby Vote. But what does it all mean?
This baby, who met Mitt Romney at a rally in Kirkwood, Missouri in March, reacted to the Governor with incredulity. Note the baby’s attempt to recoil from the governor. Perhaps he has a spray tan allergy.
Three months later, in Orlando, Florida, another baby struggles to distance herself from Romney. That baby is a mooch that thinks she’s entitled to food, health care, and shelter, and will never be convinced to vote for Mitt Romney. Mitt Romney’s job is not to worry about that baby. Moving on!
Twins in matching America tutus! How cute! The baby on the left seems to be spacing out, but the one on the right looks a little worried about the future of Medicare. Though I’m no body language expert.
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