Gwyneth Paltrow Takes Beyoncé on Goopy Yoga Retreat

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Gwyneth Paltrow has checked herself and Beyoncé into a four-day yoga retreat in California, in order to obtain some much-needed relaxation (which makes sense, because the entire world has been squalling about their personal lives a lot this year [via Conscious Uncoupling and ElevatorGate]).

It is believed that the pair will “meditate, go on long walks and sample local wine.” On their long walks, they will talk about: artisanal toast, cool things to name babies (produce; colors), whose blog is better, and goings-on at the Illuminati headquarters. Probably.

Says a source, “Gwyneth reckons this is just what her friend needs to get her energy back.” Tbh it sounds fun. Have a great time, you two. Go crazy. Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do (by which I mean drunk yoga). [Daily Mail]


On Jimmy Kimmel, Mila Kunis went on a comedic rant about men saying “we’re pregnant,” because, you know, they’re not. “Stop saying, ‘We’re pregnant.’ You’re not pregnant! Do you have to squeeze a watermelon-sized person out of your lady-hole? No. Are you crying alone in your car listening to a stupid Bette Midler song? No. When you wake up and throw up, is it because you’re nurturing a human life? No. It’s because you had too many shots of tequila. Do you know how many shots of tequila we had? None. Because we can’t have shots of tequila. We can’t have anything because we’ve got your little love goblin growing inside of us. All you did was roll over and fall asleep.” [E!]


Here is a pic of Prince Harry and a goat having a moment. You’re welcome. [Just Jared]


  • Naya Rivera reactivated her Twitter account, which she deleted on Tuesday. And all is right in the world once more. [E!]
  • Matt Lauer says that Tom Cruise was his most awkward interview, which makes a lot of sense. He must have spent the entire time nervous about couch antics and Scientology. [Page Six]
  • “Is It Time to Start Caring About Teen YouTube Celebrities?” inquires one of the horsemen of the apocalypse. [ONTD]
  • Cara Delevingne and Jourdan Dunn got matching best friend tattoos. [ONTD]
  • Kimye is in Mexico, enjoying life, as Kimye does. [People]
  • Ok I’m pretty sure the only one “inside Stacy Keibler‘s ‘super healthy’ pregnancy'” is her unborn child. [People]
  • Sophia Grace and Rosie have a movie now. [TMZ]
  • Here is a photo of Matt Bomer posing with Zachary Quinto at the amfAR Inspiration Gala, in case you wanted to start out your day with TOO MUCH HANDSOME. [Just Jared]
  • Ricky Martin remade his “Livin’ La Vida Loca” video, just like you’d always hoped he would. [Daily Mail]
  • Channing Tatum reached Peak Affable Bro at the 22 Jump Street premiere (i.e., he climbed atop a DJ tower and started shooting t-shirts at people out of a t-shirt gun). [Pop Sugar]
  • Pretty Little Liars has gotten renewed for 2 new seasons, despite having run out of all comprehensible plot lines. I feel like babies who were born during season 1 of PLL are now graduating college. [Cosmo]
  • Kris Jenner says that no one cared that Beyoncé and Jay Z didn’t come to the Kimye wedding. OK, KRIS. SURE. I was sad whence Beyoncé didn’t come to my birthday party at Medieval Times, and she didn’t even RSVP. [Cosmo]
 
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