

While Lady Gaga has always lived on Earth, she has never been of Earth. Whether through witchcraft or purposeful delusion, she has traipsed through her career like a glamorous alien—endlessly changing between pop goddess and pop victim and makeup mogul and Amazon employee and movie star and Vegas showgirl, all while maintaining an over-the-top predilection for wigs and couture. It’s been an ideal existence for her! Sadly, the Lady Gaga we’ve known and loved is dead. Well, not dead in the literal sense. Dead in that she’s finally moved far, far, far away from the rest of us—back to her home planet! This is the same as dying, because how often do you really text your out-of-town friends anyway?