Mermaid Bracket, Round 3: Seems Like You're All Really Into Being Human!
Entertainment

Friends, beauty-lovers and Cthulu stans, we are really zipping along on our journey to find out which mythical creature will become the America’s Next Top Model of the beauty world.
Here are the results from yesterday, which was a whirlwind of voting, but ULTIMATELY worth it.
Let’s get into the results of the Creature Division!! Hippocamp (8) lost by a pretty wide margin to the Kelpie (9), because it’s better to be a horse that is also a person, but in the water. While we adore the avant-garde aesthetic of the Chupacabra (4), it’s clear that Fiona the Hippo (13) was going to win this round. You seem to really be into things with human heads, which is likely why Sphinx (6) overtook Cthulu (11). Narwhals (14) are fun because they’re aquatic unicorns; a Chimera (3) is too much Look. Congrats, sea unicorns. Noticing a trend here: Selkies (7) are human sometimes, so they clearly beat the Kraken (10). Though Totoro (15) is arguably cuter, you’d all rather be a half-bird, so a Harpy (2) won that round.
It’s heating up! It’s getting crazy! Here are your Fairy Tale results! We’re not entirely shocked that no one wanted to be an Ogre (8) and everyone wanted to be a Satyr (9), because I guess being part human is helpful. We are surprised that the Leprechaun (12) overtook the Giant (5). Everyone loves Elves (4) and hates the idea of being a waterfowl, so Ugly Duckling (13), sorry for your loss. Sirens (6), the goth, murderous mermaids, are way better than Hags (11), I guess. No one wants to be a Troll (3) and 68 percent of you want to be a Frog Princess (14); in other encouraging news, everyone wants to be a Gingerbread Woman (10) and is generally disinterested in being a regular old Princess (7). Nice. And finally, being Thumbelina (15) seems like more trouble than it’s worth, so by default (?), the elusive Nymph (2) takes the stage.

Let’s hustle and finish this shit up!
First up—Monsters.
Gorgons (8)—a regular woman, but with snakes for hair—probably photograph well on Instagram but present a unique but not totally insurmountable styling challenge. The Loch Ness Monster (9) is essentially Lana Del Rey but a sea creature—mysterious brooding, sad, etc—but with skin the texture of a wet suit and an air of mystery.
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As a FrankenWOMAN (5), the fun part is that you’re basically a human being, but you’re also really, really sensitive and non-verbal, BUT you’re tall and sort of lumbering, so clothes might drape well. The trouble with the Babadook (12) is that you’re already a LGBTQ icon and so doing anything OTHER than living in a basement eating worms probably goes against your contract.
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The fun thing about a Mummy (4) is that they’re already sort of chic, seeing as they’re pre-wrapped and dressed with a very specific aesthetic that doesn’t really waver. As a Cenobite (13)—those demons from Hellraiser that live in Hell and are sort of humanesque—you’ve already got a very specific aesthetic, but the various face mutiliations (e.g. Pinhead) present challenges and opportunity.