Nancy Grace Has Tits, And Other Things We Learned From The DWTS Premiere

By Whitney Jefferson  |  September 20, 2011 | 3:00pm
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This season of Dancing With The Stars arrived with much anticipation, and more importantly, speculation: Will the audience “boo” Chaz Bono? Will David Arquette be acting crazy? With there be Kardashians in attendance? Will Nancy Grace display a little of what her last name implies she has? (Well, no, but her breasts sure made a great showing.) Here’s your water-cooler talking points.

Above: Nancy Grace is sexy.
The rehearsal footage shows Grace struggling to figure out how to “act sexy” as she dances. Then suddenly, as if a literal lightbulb went off in her head, she grabs her breasts. Now that Grace has gotten in touch with her feminine side, her boobies are everywhere. So you’d better get used to it.


Rob Kardashian is ready for his close-up.
The youngest Kardashian wants you to know he’s not here because his sister Kim appeared on the show in season seven. Plus, he tells his dance partner Cheryl Burke “you’re my woman” (amongst other things) and she sets him straight.


Chaz Bono has decent skills.
With one exception: his dance partner, who happened to be writhing around and simulating sex during their whole routine. Otherwise, an A for effort!


Elisabetta Cannalis knows what you think she’s famous for.
For doing George Clooney. And yes, that’s exactly what she’s famous for. But she’s looking to make a different name for herself, mainly for a barely-clothed dance to Katy Perry’s “Friday Night” that included kicking her shirtless partner out of a bed on the dance floor.


Kristin Cavilari is not a bitch anymore.
It was just Laguna Beach and The Hills that made you think that way.

One more time: Nancy Grace’s boobs.
Her “twins” were truly the star of the show.

 
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