Succession Is Returning With Some Incredibly Horny Promos

This new Kendall and Stewy promo? HBO knows exactly what it's doing.

By Ashley Reese | October 13, 2021 | 8:12pm

Entertainment TV

Succession Is Returning With Some Incredibly Horny Promos

As the long-awaited season three premiere of HBO’s Succession approaches, the program’s social media team is happily bombarding us with horny bait.

On Wednesday, the official Succession Twitter and Instagram accounts shared promo videos featuring the show’s stars from the premiere party the previous night. One of the videos featured Jeremy Strong, who plays Kendall Roy, once poised to be the successor of the fictitious Waystar Royco media (and family) empire, and Arian Moayed, who plays Stewy Hosseini, Kendall’s crafty billionaire buddy. The two have a long-running friendship slash rivalry that can only be described as toxic, which means that people obviously ship the fuck out of it. And the Succession team and even its actors must know that by now, because look at this video:

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Stewie literally circling a timid Kendall like he’s prey? Please. Team Succession knows exactly what they were doing with this edit. And for any readers under the impression that I’m an outlier in my take, take a look at the Twitter replies.

“You don’t know what you’ve done with this video,” one Succession fan replied. On the contrary, they absolutely know what the fuck they’ve done with this video. There are Succession fans who ship this pairing aggressively, and they’re being catered to accordingly. Television shows and film franchises succumbing to fan service rarely ends well, and it’s doubtful that the series would stoop to that level, but the sky’s the limit for promos: Get the fans excited about something that probably won’t happen, but keep them a little hopeful throughout the season.

Then, there’s the relationship between Tom Wambsgams (Matthew Macfadyen) and Cousin Greg (Nicholas Braun). Tom, an executive at Waystar Royco, has spent most of his time in the Succession universe trying to preserve his relationship with his wife, Shiv Roy, and taking Shiv’s cousin, Greg, under his wing. Showing Greg the ropes meant hiding a few corporate crimes along the way, which only intensified the odd and entertaining dependent relationship between the two.

So, naturally, people ship them too.

It’s all good fun, but HBO knew how to get the Tom/Greg shippers excited too. Back in September, they released this little promotional image:

That’s bait, baby!

Again, it’s unlikely that we’ll be seeing any actual Tom/Greg moments in the upcoming season. But did that stop a Variety reporter from asking Macfadyen about a potential “love triangle” between Tom, Shiv, and Greg during the premiere? Of course not.

Macfadyen demurred, insisting he was terrified of accidentally spoiling anything. I’m convinced he was more interested in keeping the intrigue going than anything else, but sure.

And finally, the most believable bait of all: the promo surrounding Roman Roy (Kieran Culkin) and Gerri (J. Smith-Cameron), who is acting General Counsel of Waystar Royco. There has been palpable tension between the two for two seasons straight, much of which is played off for laughs and speculation about Roman’s offbeat sexual proclivities. However, there’s always a chance that something real and sexy might transpire between the two in season three.

Again, the replies are gold.

But for anyone hoping for a cute video like we got with Kendall and Stewy, well… sorry, there’s nothing else to nibble on just yet. You’ll have to take this poster of Gerri treating Roman like her bitch and like it, slime puppies.