Beyoncé and Jay Z Will Be Drunk In Love All Summer on Joint Tour

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In the aftermath of the blood moon, just as some Bible enthusiasts predicted, a special message to America has emerged from the celestial chaos. That message is: BEYONCE AND JAY-Z ARE GOING ON TOUR TOGETHER.

Yes, dear reader: America’s favorite very hot and talented married couple reportedly have plans to announce a 20-stadium US tour that starts in June. They might play in New York on July 4th.

Both have recently wrapped separate tours, and they’ve performed “Drunk In Love” literally everywhere (the Grammys, a Super Bowl party, London, probably at least once in their kitchen), so it’s not the most surprising of announcements. With that said, though, BLESSED BE. [Page Six]


Miley Cyrus was hospitalized last night after having a severe allergic reaction to her antibiotics, and her show in Kansas was therefore canceled. She’s recovering well, though, and she took to Twitter to express contrition through a series of emoji — which USA Today struggled to translate into the AP Style: “Kansas I promise Im as (heartbroken) as you are. I wanted so badly 2 b there 2night. (sad face) Not being with yall makes me feel sh*&%er than I already do (face with medical mask).” [USA Today]


Prince Harry‘s friends think that Cressida Bonas is too much of a free spirit to accept the job of marrying him, which is insane. IF A FREE SPIRIT CANNOT SUCCESSFULLY BE A PRINCESS THEN I HAVE BEEN LIED TO MY ENTIRE LIFE. [E!]