Everyone Going Through a Breakup Should Get to Have Lunch With Laura Dern

We’ve already addressed the fact that Irina Shayk is weathering her split from Bradley Cooper by wearing a vinyl skirt in a helicopter. Excellent recovery strategy! B+! But breakups are a war, and in this case, I think Bradley Cooper’s lunch with Laura Dern was exactly the right move.

I have absolutely no idea what Cooper and Dern’s friendship is like. What I do know is that, dressed in the same outfit her daughter wore to Zoë Kravitz’s wedding, Dern comes across as a soothing relationship oracle placed in Manhattan for the express purpose of saying exactly the right thing and gesturing in exactly the right way; placing a sympathetic hand on a shoulder at precisely the right moment. We should all get a Laura Dern to talk to during trying times! It should be a Constitutional right! Who’s with me!