Here's Vin Diesel Dancing Alone to Beyoncé for Seven Minutes

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Earlier this morning, huggable pile of bowling balls Vin Diesel posted a 7-minute-long video to Facebook that featured him lip syncing/singing to Katy Perry’s “Dark Horse” and dancing to Beyoncé’s “Drunk In Love” with no further explanation. It’s truly a great moment in internet — nay, human — history.

An unsophisticated consumer of Vin Diesel’s art might wonder what time it is where he is, what possessed him to share this with his 63 million Facebook fans, and why his eyes look so glazed and saucery, like black Fiestaware, during so bright an hour. But a true connoisseur of the beauty of the human form would relish the way the Fast & Furious star slowly builds from his restrained performance of “Dark Horse” to his more expressive interpretation of “Drunk In Love,” how he tenderly grabs his crotch, or artistically pantomimes riding on a surfboard when Beyonce sings “SURFBOART.” This is the Great Wall of China of selfies. Astronauts can see it from space.

 
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