Women’s magazine editors have taken another step in their ongoing campaign against reality. While we mortals are raking leaves, sipping pumpkin spice lattes, and breaking out the sweaters, airbrushed beauties are frolicking in floral dresses on sun-drenched magazine covers.
When pastel hues showed up in the October and November issues of Cosmo, Vogue, Elle, InStyle, and Teen Vogue, we didn’t fault editors for wanting to enjoy the last few warm autumn days. However, Jessica Alba lounging on a pool float under a bush of pinkish blooms in the December issue of Elle is taking things a bit too far.
Sorry, Jessica. We know it’s always warm somewhere, but December is not the time for pink bikini tops with matching high-waisted skirts. (Okay, for us it’s never the time for midriff-bearing casual wear, but it just feels like she’s taunting us in this shot.)
Probable Photoshopping aside, Vogue actually got it right with its November cover. Rather than mocking our impending seasonal depression from some tropical locale, Anne Hathaway’s lounging indoors in a rich burgundy gown. It’s a cover that says, “Hey, winter’s not so bad!” Though the reality is that unlike Anne, we’ll be trudging through sleet and snow in a hideous puffy parka, not “seductive country tweeds.”