“We’re Not a Stupid Country” Says Secretary of State, Reassuringly

If there’s one thing that you can reliably, reasonably expect a non-stupid country to need to assert publicly, then surely it’s “We’re not a stupid country.” Otherwise, you know … how would anyone know how lacking in stupidity you are? It’s important to proclaim your non-stupidity as loudly and forcefully as possible, just in case any of the genuinely stupid folks in the back can’t hear you. Secretary of State Marco Rubio has clearly taken such lessons to heart, given his eloquent statements to the media today, in which he explained that just because the United States and Iran are currently firing weapons at each other, that doesn’t mean they’ve broken a “ceasefire.” Far from it!

“What you saw yesterday was U.S. destroyers moving through international waters being fired upon by the Iranians, and the U.S. responded defensively to protect itself,” said Rubio, referring to U.S. military strikes that were reported to have taken out at least a handful of Iranian boats. “Only stupid countries don’t shoot back when you’re shot at. And we’re not a stupid country.”

They could never finish what they started, and now we all must pay the price for their folly.

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— George Takei (@georgetakei.bsky.social) May 6, 2026 at 1:30 PM

These engagements were, as Secretary of Defense Pete Hegseth has also helpfully pointed out within the last week, absolutely not part of “Operation Epic Fury,” because if they were, the President would be compelled by U.S. law to seek the approval of Congress for the ongoing military operation that has stretched past the 60-day limit for undeclared wars enumerated by the War Powers Act of 1973. Instead, this particular firing of weapons—which does not disrupt a ceasefire—is “separate and distinct.” But also, as Rubio put it, “The red line is clear: If they threaten Americans, they’re going to get blown up.” You know, blown up in such a way that the ceasefire remains in place. Respectfully.

So continues the absurd tango that the President, the DOD and the State Department remain mired in, where they simultaneously have to project threats and warnings toward Iran, and occasionally shoot at them, while also lying to Americans that the war is over and everything is returning to normal. According to Rubio, the U.S. is still waiting today on the response from Iran on a U.S. proposal to end the war, which is exactly what we were also told yesterday, with the Secretary of State blaming the fact that “their system is still highly fractured, and it’s dysfunctional as well, so that may be serving as an impediment” to progress. As the top diplomat of a “not stupid” country, this is surely a situation that Rubio would be entirely unfamiliar with. He also noted reporting that Iran, in terms of the future of the Strait of Hormuz (which was free to all before the war), “has established or trying to establish some agency that’s going to control traffic in the Strait,” which “would actually be unacceptable.” Well, I’m sure that won’t complicate those peace talks any further, right?

It’s kind of funny to have Marco Rubio weighing in on the conflict at all, given the fact that the Secretary of State has often seemed entirely uninvolved in negotiations or peace talks related to the war. Instead, he’s recently been busy with things like trying to rebuild the PR disaster of Trump’s unprovoked battle with the new Pope, when he’s not being feted by CBS News or obediently attempting to fit into the dress shoes he’s instructed to wear by Trump. And of course, some part of Rubio’s lizard brain is always trained on his wishes for the destruction of Cuba, currently embroiled in yet another humanitarian disaster that the U.S. has no intent on aiding. Rubio is probably annoyed that the Iran entanglement has taken this long, or else he could perhaps already be in the middle of remaking Cuba as he sees fit while installing a new Castro as a shadow ruler.

WATCH: Rubio admits “the goal” is now just to go “back to the way it was” before Trump’s costly, deadly, pointless war

Great job guys! 😕🙃

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— The Tennessee Holler (@thetnholler.bsky.social) May 6, 2026 at 8:19 AM

Trump, meanwhile, continues to display his trademark schizophrenic, instantly contradicting pronouncements when it comes to the topic of Iran. In reference to the attacks from both sides on Thursday, he told reporters last evening that “they trifled with us today,” so “we blew them away.” The current U.S. deal he’s angling for appears to be … basically the exact state of affairs that was established when the “ceasefire” first began, only with an open Strait of Hormuz. Which was, of course, open before all this pointless (but incredibly expensive) violence began.

Iran, for what it’s worth, seems interested in pretty much none of it, having clearly realized just how much more influence they now have over the region than ever as long as they can bring the Strait of Hormuz to a standstill at will. Iranian Foreign Minister Abbas Araghchi proclaimed today that Iran would “never bow to pressure,” and said of the U.S. strikes: “Every time a diplomatic solution is on the table, the U.S. opts for a reckless military adventure. Whatever the causes, the outcome is the same: Iranians never bow to pressure and diplomacy is always the victim.”

As I write this, the U.S. military has apparently just fired on several more Iranian tankers in the Strait, action that will no doubt take the level of peacefulness in this ironclad ceasefire to new heights of ceasing fire. As Marco Rubio observed in what I can only imagine will be scrawled across the monument over his graveyard plot one day: “We’re not a stupid country.”