Milan Men’s Fashion Week Had 2 Vibes: Mediterranean Guy and Berghain Guy

Chris Pine, Regé-Jean Page, Andrew Garfield, and more, put on their best linens or best blacks and launched the two personalities of Summer 2023.

By Lauren Tousignant | June 20, 2023 | 10:35pm

Beauty Style

The temperatures in Milan this weekend reached the mid-90s, and the simmering heat seems to have inspired all the European fashion influencers attending Milan Men’s Fashion Week to go for one of two very distinct summer looks: trust fund baby on a Mediterranean yacht or trust fund baby at Berghain.

Designers including Prada, Dolce & Gabbana, Valentino, and Giorgio Armani also happened to show menswear collections that oscillated between taupe summer linens and just, All Black. And while I admit that it’s lazy to simply categorize trends into two opposite groups (edgy or feminine; neon or neutral; Marilyn or Jackie, blah, blah, blah),at this year’s Milan Men’s Fashion Week, it really was this black and, well, tan.

Now I’ve never been to Berghain, nor have I ever been on a yacht in the Mediterranean, but the fashionistas in Milan have decreed it: This summer, you’re either a Mediterranean guy or a Berghain guy. You must choose.

Let’s take a look.

Outside the Etro show

Tiny sunglasses? Check. Sheer fabric? Check. Everything black except for your hair? Check! (And love!)

Rahi Chadda outside the Neil Barrett show

The influencer looks like the captain of his 98-foot yacht just told him it’s going to be another hour until anchors up, and he’s mildly annoyed to be stuck waiting on the dock in Amalfi.

A guest at Milan Men’s Fashion Week

The snake necklace and gold bracelet might verge on trying too hard, but the cigarette says, “I could care less what you think.”

Outside the Giorgio Armani show

It takes a lot of money to look this effortlessly wrinkled and laid back.

Outside the JW Anderson show

The top says business meeting but the leather shorts say I mean business, and I’m feeling inspired to wear something similar to the next baby shower I get invited to.

Zegna

If you don’t own a yacht and decide to wear this out in public, it’ll just look like you’re trying to look like you own a yacht. So if you’re planning to wear this anywhere but a yacht...don’t.

A guest at Milan Men’s Fashion Week

The hottest accessory for this summer is simply, carrying a gorgeous bouquet of flowers. (Would a gift like this get you into Berghain? Let me know!)

Andrew Garfield at Zegna

I feel like his stare is judging me for not being as rich as he is.

Outside the Dolce & Gabbana show

This outfit might as well have “Ask me about my checking account” written down the pant leg.

Outside the Dolce & Gabbana show

As I said, I’ve never tried to get into Berghain, but from what I’ve heard, I’m confident in saying that this look would definitely be deemed as trying too hard.

Regé-Jean Page outside the Giorgio Armani show

Our favorite Bridgerton-er looks like he’s on his way to eat out—sorry I mean, slurp up—a couple of pitchers of Aperol Spritzes.

Outside the Dolce & Gabbana show

Oh hello, a French tuck! Someone clearly has themselves a little Tan France style guide.

Two guests at Milan Men’s Fashion Week

There is not a single mistake about either of these outfits except for wearing a long, wool, plaid skirt and leather boots on a hot summer day.

Antonia Dell’Atte outside the Giorgio Armani show

Everything that the former Italian model is wearing just screams, “I am a former Italian model.”

Outside the Magliano show

This is NOT your mother’s Christmas Eve party.

Outside the Magliano show

Can someone check on this dude? Make sure he didn’t try to fly back to Ibiza?

Dolce & Gabbana

Never forget that pants are nothing more than a social construct. (And glad to see this man does not skip leg day.)

Jean-Claude Mpassy outside the Prada show

Kick me in the face.

Shuzo outside the Prada show

I have never seen any actor ever look this impossibly cool without also looking like someone who’d bully me.

Outside the Dolce & Gabbana show

I assume this is who the orcas envision they’re tipping over when they set out to tip over boats.

Outside the Neil Barrett show

I love a man in a skirt. And, even more so, I love a man in neon!

Madior Fall outside the MSGM show

Take me to (your Mediterranean) church.

A guest at Milan Men’s Fashion Week

This is a perfect Saturday summer night look to me. No fuss, no muss, no notes.

Outside the Neil Barrett show

My eyes are screaming for just a drop of color.

Outside the JW Anderson show

I will not be bothering this man with my comments.

Outside the Etro show

If I was rich, I would wear breezy white button-ups, tie printed silk scarves around my neck, and randomly Venmo $10,000 to strangers who were nice to me—if any rich people are looking for some fun, new ideas to get rid of some money.

A guest at Milan Men’s Fashion Week

Ok, I really love this outfit, except for the camo top! It’s summer! It’s hot! Take off that stuffy long-sleeve and let’s have some fun!

Outside the Emporio Armani show

If I owned a boat and this person walked up to me, I would simply give it to them.

Outside the Etro show

I would say that the layered studded belts are a little bit too “Sk8tr Boi” for me, but I wouldn’t want the grim reaper on the skirt to hear!

Chris Pine at the Zegna show

When your new friends invite you to their yacht at the last minute and you have no idea what you’re supposed to wear.

Outside the Prada show

For when you’re going straight from Berghain to Mallorca.

Outside the Emporio Armani show

Another Orca target.

Outside the Jordanluca show

Congratulations to this future baby for getting two of the coolest parents I’ve ever seen.

Gottmik & Anna dello Russo outside JW Anderson

The two Milan Men’s Fashion Week personalities coming together as one.