There are going to be kookoos any time a celebrity dies—we weren’t there when it happened, so, invariably, we don’t know the real truth. I am cool with this because I love to dream, since dreaming doesn’t hurt anyone. But we have just hit the conspiracy jackpot: the 79-year-young Antonin Scalia, a highly-controversial figure with one of the most coveted jobs in the country—a job you can only lose if you die or retire—passed away with a pillow semi-near his head, without any witnesses.
I’d tell you to do the math, but a bunch of Republicans already have.
This weekend, InfoWars.com founder Alex Jones posted an “emergency transmission” to his Facebook page, in which he responded to Scalia’s death with some valuable information from his gut.
“The question is, was Antonin Scalia murdered? And the answer to that is, has the Bill of Rights and Constitution been murdered? Has it been reported that members of the Supreme Court have been blackmailed? Yes it has,” he said in the video, noting that the term “natural causes” was a euphemism. “And I wish it was natural causes, but man, my gut tells me no. And if this is an assassination, this signifies that they are dropping the hammer.”
During a Monday interview with conservative radio host Michael Savage, Donald Trump graced this important national conversation with his presence.
“It’s a horrible topic,” Trump said, “but they say they found the pillow on his face, which is a pretty unusual place to find a pillow. I can’t give you an answer… I literally just heard it a little while ago. It’s just starting to come out now, as you know, Michael.”
(John Poindexter, owner of the Cibolo Creek Ranch where Scalia’s body was found, has denied the suspicious pillow’s placement to CNN: “He had a pillow over his head, not over his face as some have been saying. The pillow was against the headboard and over his head when he was discovered. He looked like someone who had had a restful night’s sleep. There was no evidence of anything else.”)
Fanning the flames even more is the fact that Scalia’s family requested to forego an autopsy.
“As a former homicide commander, I am stunned that no autopsy was ordered for Justice Scalia,” wrote William O. Ritchie, former head of criminal investigations for the D.C. police department, in a Facebook post. “You have a Supreme Court Justice who died, not in attendance of a physician. You have a non-homicide trained U.S. Marshal tell the justice of peace that no foul play was observed. You have a justice of the peace pronounce death while not being on the scene and without any medical training opining that the justice died of a heart attack.