Pour one out for Sean Spicer, America’s water wiggly, who has finally been eliminated from a competition he had no earthly business entering in the first place: After eight interminable weeks, he’s finally been booted from Dancing With the Stars.
Spicer’s inability to dance was breathtaking; even his previous partner, Lindsay Arnold, put him at a “pre-pre-school level” and noted that he “definitely isn’t natural at it.” Below, please find his final performance, an “Argentine” “tango” that is simply neither of those things:
Spicer, along with dance partner Jenna Johnson, was voted in the bottom two alongside country music star Lauren Alaina and her partner, Gleb Savchenko. Thanks to new rules this season, the judges — Carrie Ann Inaba, Bruno Tonioli and Len Goodman — choose which couple survives for another week. Goodman only weighs in if there is a tie, but there was no need for that on Monday.
“It’s never easy to send anyone home, because I know that both couples have given your heart and soul to every moment of this competition,” said Inaba, only prolonging the obvious. “But for me, there is one couple that stands out. The couple I want to save is Lauren and Gleb.”
Earlier in the show, Donald Trump posted and deleted a tweet urging people to vote for Spicer after he was already eliminated, writing, “Vote for Sean Spicer on Dancing With the Stars. He is a great and very loyal guy who is working very hard. He is in the quarterfinals – all the way with Sean!”
Now that Spicer is off the show, what will he do with his time? Who cares! The better question is: Is this the last time we’ll have to think about him ever again? Could we possibly be so lucky?