Earlier this month, Justin Bieber and Selena Gomez denied that the ring she’s sporting is an engagement ring, but now there’s an amusing twist on the rumor that repeatedly sends Beliebers into an uncontrollable rage. This Christmas Selena plans to present Justin with an engagement ring to take his mind off that fake paternity suit. What gender role reversing fun! This story comes to us via the National Enquirer, so we’re pretty sure it isn’t true, but at least this heap of lies is entertaining. “Selena is crazy about Justin, and she hates seeing him so upset over the paternity allegations,” says a friend who doesn’t exist. “He’s been on edge thinking Selena might leave him, so she wants to get him a ring to show that she’s with him for the long haul.” Thus Selena plans to pop the question in front of Justin’s family in Canada this Christmas. Justin’s mom is in on the plan and is happy because she wants Justin to stop talking about how he wants babies. The source adds, “Pattie thinks Justin is talking about having kids partly because he’s afraid of losing Selena. But if Selena proposes, Pattie thinks Justin will feel more secure, and she’ll be able to talk them into putting off a wedding and kids.” [National Enquirer]
In an interview with Anderson Cooper that airs monday (on his silly talk show, so it’s an especialy big coup for AC), Angelina Jolie says that she doesn’t think Brad Pitt is really retiring from acting at 50. She adds that she’s excited about retirement: “I’m happy for it. No, we were both racing to see which one of us gets to retire first. We both, like most people, we like being home. Whoever is the one who is home tends to be the happier one because we get to play with the kids and the other one is out earning the money.” She knows they’re already filthy rich, right? [Radar]
Lindsay didn’t let missing her big Playboy reveal on Ellen keep her down. Hours later she was partying at a Jay-Z concert. [TMZ]
Yet, Lindsay managed to make it into court this morning — and got a glowing report! She’s logged 120 hours at the morgue and has completed five sessions with a therapist. [E!]
Here’s the news you really care about: What Lindsay wore to court. [TMZ]
Congratulations to nutritionist Majid Ali! Many people have said breathtakingly offensive things about Ali Lohan‘s weight, but this is really a masterpiece of “does not treat the star” dickishness: “She looks like a death camp survivor … It appears as if she is wasting away as her body chews up muscle looking for fuel.” [Radar]
- Kim Kardashian bought Elizabeth Taylor‘s three jade and diamond bracelets for $65,000. Frankly, they’re not all that attractive, but Kim thinks jade harnesses the wearer’s energy. I guess owning bracelets haunted by Elizabeth Taylor are worth a few thousand dollars. [TMZ]
- Important update on the First Family’s TV watching habits. The President says, “For the girls and me, Modern Family, that’s our favorite show.” However, when Obama’s watching TV by himself he goes with Boardwalk Empire and Homeland. [E!]
- Clear your schedule for October 2012, because R. Kelly is hosting a five-day cruise that will include two concerts. There’s severe joke bottlenecking in my brain right now, so please go nuts in the comments. [N.Y. Mag]
- The custody battle over Teen Mom Amber Portwood‘s daughter Leah is over. A judge granted Amber and Gary Shirley joint custody, but Leah will live with Gary. He Tweeted, “Today amongst all days is the single greatest day for the rest of my life:)…My daughter officially mine. More than before. Love you so much @leah_leann so were hitting up some Disney in Florida to celebrate. :)” [E!]
- Courtney Stodden continues to screw with us. When asked what celebrity she’d like to meet she said, “I’d love to meet Senator John McCain one day. What a cutie!” [ONTD]