Fantastic news to the world’s most talented athletes who also happen to be gay! You’re more than welcome at this year’s Winter Olympics in Sochi, Russia, but there are a few “lifestyle” caveats the Russian authorities would have you know about— first, you will be expected to “respect Russian law” and second, you must never EVER impose your very gay habits on others. Not quite sure what that means, but I’m guessing it has something to do with glitter-bombing. Whatever. You weren’t planning on doing that anyway.
One other thing you should be aware of — you and your fellow, foreign gay competitors will be the only gay people to ever reside (however briefly) in Sochi, Russia. This information comes directly from Sochi mayor Anatoly Pakhomov who told BBC Panorama that “We do not have [homosexuals] in our city.”