Trump Is Waiting to See If He Wins to Decide If Americans Are Worth Saving

By Emily Alford  |  October 6, 2020 | 9:40pm
NewsPolitics
Trump Is Waiting to See If He Wins to Decide If Americans Are Worth Saving
Image:Win McNamee (Getty Images)

In a series of tweets, Donald Trump has announced that he ordered his little government friends, who also happen to be salaried employees of the American people, to stop negotiating a coronavirus stimulus package with Democrats until after the upcoming presidential election. If the election works out in his favor, then, according to the president’s own tweets, he may begin giving a shit about the welfare of his constituents:

“I have instructed my representatives to stop negotiating until after the election when, immediately after I win, we will pass a major Stimulus Bill that focuses on hardworking Americans and Small Business,” the President of the United States threatened tweeted.

So, just so we are clear, the president will begin doing his job after we hire him to do it for four more years, despite the fact that he is not doing it now. Let this sentence serve as notice to my editors that I also will cease blogging until I am given a raise. Ha ha.

Also, remember two days ago when people were saying it was mean to gloat about Donald Trump having covid? Is it still mean to say we should have told him to wait until November 4 to see if he is worth medical attention? [Twitter]

To those who are still undecided about whether to vote for a president who wants them to live and one who does not really care either way, former first lady Michelle Obama asks, “Won’t someone think of the children?” This is, admittedly, much nicer than any question I currently have for these undecided people.

In a video titled “Closing Argument,” Obama testified to Trump’s general incompetence by addressing his specific incompetence at allowing schools to just do whatever the fuck they want right now. This easygoing attitude has left sick college students trapped on campus with very little recourse for accessing help, while everyone else is trapped what Obama calls an “endless cycle of uncertainty,” especially pronounced to those struggling with childcare and trying to make rent.

““It’s painful to think that months into this crisis, this is still where we are. With no clear plan,” Obama said, just four hours before Trump announced that there will be no further planning until November 4 at the earliest. [Twitter]