What Are You Buying From the Homeless Not Toothless Silent Auction?

Dorit Kemsley's favorite charity returned to RHOBH with a big silent auction. The gals didn't seem to buy anything, so I've highlighted some remaining items.

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Kyle Richards, Dorit Kemsley, and Crystal Kung Minkoff at the Homeless Not Toothless Benefit in April. Photo: Shutterstock

Homeless Not Toothless, the unfortunately-named charity patronized by Dorit Kemsley, made its return to The Real Housewives Of Beverly Hills this week. While the name has long been a punchline for the audience at home–and every Housewife not named Dorit Kemsley–since it first appeared on RHOBH last season, Kemlsey insists it’s not a joke and is, in fact, a serious charity. Dorit often has various activities that one might call “schemes,” like a redesign of Buca di Beppo’s Capri room or a very expensive wedding dress collaboration. But Homeless Not Toothless seems more legitimate, boasting celebrity involvement from Sharon Stone and William H. Macy.

And bad name aside—as Kyle Richards points out in the most recent episode, the implication that we have to decide between homes or teeth is not an ideal one—pro bono dental work is objectively a good thing.

It’s also a good thing for those of us watching at home since we got to watch the H-wives enjoy a set from Taylor Dayne and a speech from Paula Abdul in between Crystal Kung Minkoff calling Annemarie Wiley a bitch. But the debate about whether Sutton Stracke’s purportedly small esophagus was genetic or due to an eating disorder was no match for Dorit’s determination to throw the best dang charity fundraiser possible. It was a big night for everyone involved, and it all hinged on a silent auction that the ladies perused but didn’t actually buy anything from, at least on camera.

Lucky for us, and even though this seemed to have been filmed in April, there are still a bunch of these items for sale on the official Homeless Not Toothless website, and I’ve taken the liberty to highlight some of them. And I beg the question: What are you buying? I, for, one am partial to one of the vacations or maybe even the Kobe Bryant jersey, but I need a sense of where everyone’s head is at.

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