I have pretended to get emergency phone calls while on bad dates, but no one has ever asked to follow me to the hospital. Choose your exit strategy for failed romance wisely, people.
This blurb from a police blotter will make some people say, “Oh no, she was scared of a man and on a hike alone with him and this is a sad story,” but I am going to imagine it as just an awkward bailout that snowballed into her getting helicoptered off an Amherst mountainside, like something out of a Katherine Heigl movie.