Illustration: Jim Cooke (G/O Media)
Welcome back to Jezebel’s Cancel Tournament 2019! It’s time to cancel more shit. But first, last week, you voted to delete a number of lifestyle trends.
In the category of Vapes (1) versus the New Milks (16), most of you are over vaping and voted to cancel it, 78.9 percent to 21.1 percent. People also opted to cancel Soulcycle (8) at a charming 85.8 percent over Mid-Century Modern Decor (9), which earned just 14.2 percent of votes. Keep your Don Draper furniture for another year! But it might be time to bury your Feelings (5) (sorry, Drake!), which you’ve canceled instead of Houseplants (12), 64.1 percent to 35.9 percent.
In the most passionate race of the bracket so far, Jezebel readers want Influencers (4) eliminated—an overwhelming 96.6 percent of voters—much more than they want to forfeit their Skin Care (13). Spiked seltzer can live to fizz another day, as Keto Dieting (6) is being canceled over White Claw (11), which scored only 27.9 percent of the vote. An impressive 58 percent of you chose to cancel Wellness (14) over Lacroix (3), which raked in 42 percent of votes. All YouTubers (7) will be canceled, as opposed to Gucci (10), with 65.8 percent of votes to 34.2 percent. And lastly, don’t let the cast of Vanderpump Rules know: Spray Tans (15) have been canceled over Fake Meat (2), 80.7 percent to 19.3 percent. Great news for me, a person who loves the Impossible Burger.
Today, you’re voting out Concepts. What enrages you more: Marriage (1) or Calling People “Human” (16)? Would you much rather live in a world without The Wing (8) or Men (9)? How about Women (5) or the concept of Empowerment (12)? A tricky one: are you over Personal Essays (4) or The Discourse (13)? What needs to go away forever: Brands of Twitter (6) or Astrology (11)? Pick one: Cancel Culture (2) or Cryptocurrency (15)? I get the sense that these races will be close.
You have 24 hours to cast your vote below.
There are 8 questions in the form below. Once you vote, the next question will pop up. To go back and change a vote, click the arrows. Click “Submit” at the end to make sure your votes count! Remember you’re voting for the thing you’d like to be canceled.
We’ll see you again tomorrow for the start of Round Two: Celebrities vs. Politics.
Until then, here’s the updated bracket.
