Evil Leprechaun Can’t Stop Starting Global Mischief

The latest on the White House’s attempt to dig itself out of the Middle East shithole of its own creation involves a State Department Directive, sent by U.S. Secretary of State Marco Rubio on Monday, telling U.S. diplomats to urge their counterparts to join us in blacklisting Iran’s Islamic Revolutionary Guard Corps (IRGC) and Hezbollah, according to the cable seen by Reuters.

Now this would cause some to see Rubio as a guy who’s bad at his job, or even a war criminal, but I see something else, especially on today of all days… I see a little leprechaun dead set on stirring up global mischief.

I mean, the similarities are there: He’s short, he wears oversized shoes that lead him into trouble, and now he’s pinching our allies in an attempt to get out of this mess.

“With the elevated risk of attack from Iran ​and its partners and proxies, all governments must move expeditiously to diminish the capabilities of Iran and Iran-aligned terrorist ‌groups from attacking our respective nations and citizens,” the cable to diplomats read.

It continued: “The Iranian regime is ​more sensitive ⁠to collective action than unilateral action, and that joint pressure is more likely to compel behavior change by the regime than unilateral actions alone.” In other words, now they want to come off diplomatic, despite not warning allies of the U.S.-Israeli coordinated strikes last month that killed Supreme Leader Ayatollah Ali Khamenei. And also nearly 200 civilians, mostly of them school children.

So the White House is begging allies for support over a war they started without warning, citing an “elevated risk of attack.” Meanwhile, Secretary of War/Tweedle Dumbest Pete Hegseth is urging journalists to downplay the conflict and skew the optics in a more “patriotic” light. But we can just add this to the ever-growing tally of discrepancies coming out of the White House every day since forever. 

Rubio’s global mischief also includes Cuba after Trump joked on Monday about a possible regime change, saying that he was going to “put Marco over there,” to deal with the fallout of the U.S. blockade of Venezuela—which has cut off sources of energy from the island. 

Hopefully, chasing the rainbow will lead Rubio straight to the bottom of a pot of fool’s gold, and not the presidency…

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