Girl Crush Meets Lady-Boner: Kristen Wiig And Fabrizio Moretti Hook Up

CelebritiesDirt Bag

She’s pretty much the coolest woman in the world and he’s definitely one of the most fuckable guys, so excuse me while I adjust my collar amid reports that Kristen Wiig and Fabrizio Moretti were “all over each other” Monday night. Hitting up The Black Keys album party at W Union Square club Lilium, sexy spies say they saw the pair going at it. “They were literally on top of each other,” said a fellow pervert. Now, humanity was understandably devastated when the Strokes drummer and ex-girlfriend Drew Barrymore split up, but this new pairing totally has our blessing. Which I’m sure is a relief to them both. [Page Six]
Kristen also keeps the dream alive by saying she’s not leaving SNL because she loves the cast: “We’re like Melrose Place without the murder.” [US]


High heel and back pain empresario Manolo Blahnik has ripped Katie Holmes and Tom Cruise a new one for letting Suri run around in pumps. He offers up his first bitch-slap by suggesting he didn’t know who the wee fashion plate was, then takes off his glove for the final insult: “That girl is destined to be a victim of a high heel!” [Radar]
In equally amazing Cruise-related news, Tom had to pay fans to greet him in India. [The Superficial]
Update: Tom‘s camp have denied they paid people to love on him. But they would, wouldn’t they? [BBC]


Elizabeth Olsen says she’s a regular ol’ fatty boomsticks compared to her famous siblings, and that she fears people won’t take her seriously because of her last name – despite her stellar acting chops. “I’m the curvy one of the family,” she said, adding that she’s “always had a complex about being taken seriously. I never wanted anyone to think that I would use my family name to get me anywhere.” [US]


Fans of Joss Whedon had better find a hard bit of wood to bite on now that the trailer for his new movie Cabin In The Woods is out. Schlocky horror enthusiasts will also be pleased; with old-school devices like chewing tobacco-spitting hicks and creepy cabins teaming up with Sliver-level control rooms and monsters. It looks craptastic – in the best way possible. [E!]


Katherine Heigl realizes she was this close to being America’s sweetheart, but then figured she’d have to give up her snarky ways and rightfully decided against it. “I had ’em for a second thinking maybe I was. And then I opened my mouth, and it was very clear I wasn’t,” she said. “There’s so much of my mother’s caustic, sarcastic, irreverent take on things. But I also love and embrace it.” I think she’d make for a super-fun smart-assy friend. [Times Of India]


  • Giuliana Rancic remains upbeat about her upcoming double mastectomy, saying that she finds scars beautiful and is looking forward to getting her “badge of courage.” [US]
  • He’s managed to fend off gay rumors, now Taylor Lautner‘s been branded as having a Sassy Gay Hand™. [Best Week Ever]
  • The brouhaha has largely died down, but Hilary Swank is finally opening up about that whole attending-the-birthday-of-a-human-rights-monster debacle. [E!]
  • Little Monsters go nuts after a Lady Gaga imposter risks life and limb by sashaying through her Barneys Christmas workshop. [Page Six]
  • Taylor Armstrong states the obvious, saying that she’s been a bit of “a trainwreck” lately – exhibit A. Though if I may take off my ghoul cap for a moment, she also says she’s been the victim of domestic abuse, so perhaps some slack cutting is in order. [NYDN]
  • Word on the street is that Bravo were the ones who forced Kim Richards to head to rehab, lest they lose two of their cast members in one season. [Radar]
  • Showing that The Real Housewives Of Beverly Hills has deservedly eclipsed all others in the franchise, Jill Zarin has been cut off from the freebies. [Page Six]
  • Future stalkers of Blake Lively are this much closer to knowing her address. [Page Six]
  • Cue the tedious lesbian jokes: Lindsay Lohan will debut her Playboy spread on The Ellen DeGeneres Show. [NYDN]
  • Gwen Stefani foolishly gives up her hiding spot, admitting she locks herself in her closet when she wants some peace and quiet. [Contact Music]
  • Madonna has fuelled talk of a rift with Abbie Cornish after she failed to mention the actress during a speech about W.E.. [NYDN]
  • Lily Allen thanks her fans for showing their love following the birth of her healthy daughter. After the shit she went through on the baby front, she certainly deserves it. [E!]
  • Grandson of Rita Hayworth and sometime porn actor Andrew Embiricos was found dead in a possible suicide. US]
  • Angelina Jolie is in talks to star in a new Luc Besson film. [Deadline]
  • Terrence “women are unclean” Howard says he didn’t threaten to kill his wife. [TMZ]
  • Move over Julia Roberts, Abigail Breslin makes $16,250-an-hour. [TMZ]
  • Uh-oh, Kate Middleton daring to hold her clutch in front of her stomach means only one thing: she’s filled to the brim with babies! [E!]
 
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