Here's Martha Stewart's Spanking New Profile


Last week on Today, Martha Stewart said she’d considered signing up for Today Matt Lauer sat Martha down with Sam Yagan, the CEO of Match and co-founder of OkCupid, and Martha said she would sign up for online dating “in the spirit of adventure.” Then Lauer encouraged her to talk about what she was looking for in a man.

“I don’t like the word ‘soulmate,'” Martha said.

“What are you looking for in a relationship?” Matt asked. “Are you looking for a companion? A partner? Someone to do fun things with? Would you consider marrying again?”

“Um… Depends.” That’s a no. Martha does not want to get married again, Matt. Jeez. Not every lady is hearing wedding bells all the damn time.

“I’d like to have breakfast with somebody, I’d like to go to bed with somebody,” Martha clarified. “Sleep with somebody.” Right on. She wants to get laid, cuddle, eat breakfast in bed, and then have him go back to his house. Sounds perfect.

Of course, when you’re scrolling through 71-year-old ladies, you won’t see Martha’s face:

Although Stewart was willing to use her real name and photograph in her online profile, Yagan advised against it.
“Only because I think it would be distracting to those initial conversations you have where everyone is going to be about talking to Martha, as opposed to really getting to know the person first,” he said.

That said, we went on and found what we’re pretty sure is Martha’s profile. It’s a new entry, without pictures, and describes a 71-year-old 5’9″ divorcée. Her user name includes the words in the title of her latest book and she describes herself as “curious, intelligent, entrepreneurial, hard working, fun, adventurous.”

Her intro reads:

ive been curious about online dating for a long time but like many the reluctance to try has outweighed the curiosity. after recently writing living the good long life i was reminded how central a good relationship would be

Her interests:

Cooking, Dining out, Fishing/Hunting, Gardening/Landscaping, Movies/Videos, Museums and art, Shopping/Antiques, Travel/Sightseeing

Under pets:

I have Birds, Cats, Dogs, Horses, Other

Here’s hoping she meets someone awesome.


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