In the pantheon of Real Housewives tag lines, the most memorable are the ones that are so bad that they’re great—like Shannon Beador’s “When life gives you lemons, put nine in a bowl!” or Ramona Singer’s current “I’m an acquired taste. If you don’t like me, acquire some taste!”
But then there are tag lines so dull that they’re forgotten almost as soon as they’re uttered (R.I.P Hoy-say’s “In Beverly Hills, they say you can never be too young, too thin, or too rich”) and, tragically, the tag lines for the upcoming season of Real Housewives of Orange County seem barely phoned in.
Shannon Beador: “The truth is organic, but lies are just artificial.”
Lies are by definition artificial!
Tamra Judge: “I’m pint-sized, baptized and highly prized.”
Actually, the more I think on it, this one might be good.
Meghan King Edmonds: “I can handle a baby, and women who act like one!”
Plenty of women have had babies with Jimmy Edmonds. Get over yourself!
Kelly Dodd: “If I want your opinion, I’ll give it to you.”
This is just a common saying?
Lydia McLaughlin: “If you can’t take my sparkle, then stay off my rainbow.”
I have nothing to say to you, Lydia.
Peggy Sulahian: “I’m living the American dream, one sports car at a time.”
It worked for Jay Gatsby.
Vicki Gunvalson: “I go big or go home, and I’m not going home.”
After 12 seasons, we know, honey. We know.
That being said, BIG CONGRATS to Tamra on the center orange placement.
GET JEZEBEL RIGHT IN YOUR INBOX
Still here. Still without airbrushing. Still with teeth.
