Trump’s first-ever Cabinet meeting took place on Monday in the White House, although a more appropriate location might have been Dr. Evil’s volcano lair, or the last night of camp when everybody goes around the circle and says what they like about each other.
After spouting off a typically delusional speech about his achievements thus far, Trump listened as his Cabinet—many of whom wore red ties, just like daddy—went around the room heaping exaggerated praise upon the administration and all the amazing things they have done/will do, such as scaring undocumented immigrants out of coming to the United States, and infuriating the entire world by reneging on a non-binding accord to combat climate change.
“I think the international community knows we are back,” said UN ambassador Nikki Haley, who Trump joked in April could “easily be replaced.”