A Bunch of Almost-Dead Guys Just Ran Your Safety Net Through a Shredder, Then Lit What Remained on Fire, Then Took a Giant Dump on the Ashes

Here’s all the shit we couldn’t cover today:

• Today, the Republican-led Congress passed a massive tax overhaul that would disproportionately benefit the wealthy and corporations. The bill is expected to add around $1 trillion to the national debt over the next decade, which Republicans plan to address by formally destroying the social safety net via “welfare reform” and a crackdown on what they like to call “health care entitlements.” The tax bill also opens the Arctic Wildlife Refuge up to oil and gas drilling and repeals Obamacare’s individual mandate, which means that a decade from now, 13 million fewer people will have health insurance. [Washington Post]
• After passing this legislation, Republican congressional leaders were essentially on their knees—to use a favorite phrase of the president’s—praising Lord Trump for his Incredible Leadership. This is honestly some of the weirdest shit I’ve ever seen. [Politico, Talking Points Memo]
• Meanwhile, Sen. John Tester, a red state Democrat up for reelection in 2018 (AKA one of the lawmakers initially assumed to be a gettable Dem vote on tax cuts), called the GOP’s tax push “one of the shittiest bills that’s ever come in front of the Senate.” [The Hill]
• So that Virginia House of Delegates race that went to a Democrat by one vote yesterday? Well, a three-judge panel has since ruled it a tie, and the winner will be decided by drawing lots?? What is this, the freakin’ bible? [Washington Post]
• Frank Wuco, a White House senior adviser at the Department of Homeland Security, regularly promoted conspiracy theories during various radio appearances in 2012 and 2013. [CNN]
• States are beginning to panic over CHIP funding, which Republicans blew off in favor of giving more money to their megadonors. [Politico]

Here are some tweets the president was allowed to publish:

This has been Barf Bag.