Secret Service Is So Fed Up With JD Vance They Made Merch About It

Secret Service agents assigned to Vice President JD Vance and his family are reportedly so exhausted by the job that they’ve started making commemorative coins and stickers celebrating the fact that they survived it. Asking for a friend: where we can get one of these? 

According to new reporting from MS NOW, frustration inside Vance’s protective detail has been building over what agents describe as constant last-minute schedule changes, expensive travel requests, and expectations of “royal treatment” that reportedly goes well beyond what previous vice-presidential families demanded.

The story’s most eyebrow-raising example involves when Vance proposed a Marine Two helicopter trip so his elementary-school-aged son could go to a golf lesson at Joint Base Andrews in Maryland…which is a literal 35-minute drive from D.C. The flight was ultimately canceled because of bad weather, but the fact that it was even proposed apparently left more than a few people beyond annoyed. 

One person familiar with the plans texted,”That is RIDICULOUS. Pence and Harris never pulled anything like that.” And considering operating Marine Two costs taxpayers an estimated $16,000 to $24,600 per hour, it’s easy to see why people inside the government may also have been less than thrilled.

I looked into it and normally, the child of a vice president would just ride in an armored SUV with a security detail. But according to the report, Vance has also sought helicopter transportation for other personal travel, including last-minute house-hunting trips around Virginia. Apparently traffic is for the rest of us plebians. Oh, and normal lakes, too. 

Agents say the bigger problem isn’t the one helicopter ride—it’s the unpredictability. The report says Vance’s frequent last-minute schedule changes have forced agents to repeatedly cancel their days off, rebuild security plans on the fly, and scramble to accommodate what the Secret Service calls “off-the-record” trips.

The frustration reportedly got so bad that agents designed unofficial “Bobcat OTR Survivors Club” coins and stickers, named after Vance’s Secret Service codename. The logo reportedly features a bobcat and the slogan “Advance. OTR. Repeat.” Which brings us to most surprising part of this entire story… who knew Secret Service agents had a sense of humor?

One source told MS NOW that the Vances “don’t stick to their schedules,” creating unnecessary taxpayer costs and burning out an agency that’s already stretched thin. Which is real awkward, especially when the people complaining are the ones whose entire job is making sure nothing bad ever happens to you.

Vance himself recently acknowledged how much public office changes a person’s life, saying he no longer shops for groceries, cooks his own meals, or waits in airport security lines. He also warned that living that way could turn someone into an “entitled asshole.” He said it, not us.