There are a million good reasons to do yoga: increased strength and flexibility, comfortable pants, the many health benefits, the free orgasms. Free orgasms?! Jiggawhaaa? Oh, yeah, girl, has nobody told you that you can totally get off in yoga class? It’s called a yogasm, and the Daily Beast is assuring us that it is totally normal:
“Rumors of the elusive yoga orgasm have circulated for years, but recently, teachers and students have begun discussing the phenomenon more openly. Sex researchers are also honing in on the subject: ‘It’s another way that a woman can bring herself to orgasm without touching herself,’ says sexologist Dr. Jeffre TallTrees.”
Thank you, Dr. TallTrees, but would you mind telling us how, specifically, one reaches yogasm? Asking for a friend.
It seems like you can’t just walk into any class and achieve *ahem* your goal, or everyone would be at yoga 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. Maybe famed yogi Marco Rojas can help us.
“Toned and tattooed, Rojas gives classes that are often packed with women hoping to get some hands-on instruction. He’s not afraid to get up close and personal with his students, giving them a whiff of his patchouli body odor, and quietly urging them in his Venezuelan accent to ‘lift’ this or ‘engage’ that.”
Well, I guess we know why Rojas is famous, but who knew that anyone could have an orgasm while catching a whiff of patchouli body odor? Amazing! The truth is, though, that it’s not really Rojas quietly urging you to do anything that puts you over the edge into bliss, it’s what yoga does to your muscles.
“One of yoga’s goals is to strengthen the muscles in and around the genitalia, or the mula bandha. … Ideally, a yogi engages mula bandha throughout a majority of his or her practice, which is equivalent to heavy weightlifting for the genitals.”
There is something scary about having the words “weightlifting” and “genitals” in the same sentence, but I guess we’ve got to suck it up and do whatever it takes, because when we tone our mula bandha, things get exciting! According to yoga expert Kelly Morris, “The yogasm isn’t just a fleeting moment of pleasure—it’s an expression of compassion, kindness, and enlightenment.” If you go really deep, apparently you can achieve “an eternal orgasm,” which, Morris says, is why Buddha, in his infinite “enlightenment,” is often depicted with a big smile on his face. Oops, sorry if that thought is now making you regret the purchase of that trendy little Buddha statuette for your living room.
Anyway, if the yogasm is so great, why aren’t we constantly gushing about it? Kelly Morris says it’s because we’re all afraid that we are some kind of yoga sex mutant:
“I’ve had women come up to me, usually very embarrassed and freaked-out, and ask, ‘Is this normal? Is this allowed? Is this irreligious?’ I do my best to reassure them that it’s natural. Then I tell them not to waste it, the way you have an ice cream and enjoy it and then it’s gone.”
You heard the woman: now that the cat is out of the bag, we must embrace this special breed of orgasm in the same way that we have embraced ice cream. (By indulging in it alone on the couch? Oh God, sorry…) Take a few deep breaths and get ready, because it’s probably only a matter of time before you’re going on Yogasm-centric retreats and buying specially-designed ‘Gasm pants at Lululemon.
Are Yogasms Real? [Daily Beast]
Image via Kirsty Pargeter/Shutterstock.