Donald Trump and Rabbit Henchman Commence Egg Rolling

Politics

The 139th annual White House Easter Egg Roll was hosted Monday by the forty-fifth President of the United States, rumored to be an egg lost behind the radiator 6 years ago, and his wife, Melania Trump, physical manifestation of the expression “grin and bear it.”

Trump stood on a White House balcony to welcome families to the event, alongside Melania and Barron and someone who I assume was screaming for ten minutes straight inside a silencing bunny suit. The president thanked his wife in particular, as the official host of the Easter Egg Roll according to CNN. Sure. She loves this.

“We’re going to come out and join you and enjoy your company for a roll, a great Easter egg roll. And I don’t know if people are going to be successful, but I know a lot of people down there are going to be successful. I’ve seen those kids, and they’re highly, highly competitive,” said Trump, obviously talking about himself.

Despite persistent rumors that plans for the event were chaotic and unconfirmed as recently as last week, the roll rolled on:

The White House lawn was crowded with costumed figures, supposedly including this very pointed message from PBS:

Sean Spicer made sure to put in an appearance next to the Easter Bunny, perhaps to allay suspicions that Trump might make him dress up again:

Then he went to yell an Easter story at a bunch of kids like they’re competent journalists at a White House press conference:

How’d Trump enjoy himself? Politico shared a clip of Mr. President signing a fan’s hat, then appearing to throw it randomly into the crowd while the fan yells “No!” He also seems to call a pen a “hat,” which is worrying.

Also this:

 
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