Ooh La La! Natalie Portman Is Moving to Paris


Today in places rich people are going, Natalie Portman and her hot ballerino husband Benjamin Millepied are packing up and moving to Paris. Why, Natalie? America has been so good to you! Remember Phantom Menace? We forgave you for that. We forgave you.

And yet off you flies to the city of light, all because your husband got some goofball job as the director of dance at the Paris Opera Ballet. Fine, Portman. Fine. I hope you like it there. I hope you like it soooooooo much that you invite us all to live with you so that we can live out our days sitting around your stupid apartment, drinking stupid champagne and wearing stupid kimonos and talking about stupid Gertrude Stein all day. I HOPE THAT HAPPENS.*

*Seriously, what can we do to make this happen?


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