Today’s best comments have the cure for what ails you.
• Best Comment Of The Day in response to City Councilman Calls Cops On Kids Bake Sale:
Wolfensohn was right. Once you let kids hold bake sales, it’s a slippery slope to mowing lawns, delivering papers and helping little old ladies across the street. It’s good to see that at least one public official has the guts to fight against creeping Mayberry-ism.
• Best Comment Of The Day in response to How Palin Conservatives Are Cheating The DWTS Voting System:
So what’s the big deal? She’ll win, she’ll serve about half her term, then she’ll get bored and quit so she can make more money.
• Best Comment Of The Day, also in response to How Palin Conservatives Are Cheating The DWTS Voting System:
I am so infuriated by this! God, I hate those damn clever teabaggers with the fury of a thousand suns! I have paid so very much attention to this issue and it burns my heathen junk every moment of every day! Bristol Palin on DTWS is the number one issue for liberals today! I’m so envious that folks spend three hours of their lives voting for Bristol Palin! It shows true American grit and determination, qualities which I severely lack! OMG THEY HAVE DEFEATED US.
…I have now realized the error of my ways. I feel the urge to bake an American apple pie. I think I’ll go harass a brown person, or perhaps lecture a homeless person about being lazy. The soothing voice of reason (Rush Limbaugh) invigorates my soul with correct thinking (taxes taxes taxes). My bootstraps! WHITHER MY BOOTSTRAPS!!
• Best Comment Of The Day in response to Prince William And Kate Middleton Engaged For Reals:
Here are some inevitable substitutes for Waity Katie.
When’s-the-datey Katie?
Beware-your-fatey Katie
We-saw-what-you-atey Katie
Ignore-the-hatey Katie
• Best Comment Of The Day in response to Maxim‘s Tips For “Curing” Feminists:
If you look at the pictures in reverse, you can see Jared Leto turn from a wispy butterfly into a rock god.
• Best Comment Of The Day, also in response to Maxim‘s Tips For “Curing” Feminists:
How to Cure Machismo
Turn an unshaven, militant, misogynist gasbag into an actual man!
1. Win him over
A macho man believes that not only is he smarter, funnier, and more ethical than women, but all people. Rather than joking around with him, simply laugh at everything he says. Hopefully he’ll enjoy this so much that he’ll start saying everything in a joking manner and lay off the Male Power Manifesto. Eventually, you’ll help him to see that really, everything he’s saying is a joke.
2. Open his eyes
Try taking him lingerie shopping with you. After the little fashion show in the store, let him treat you to the pieces he likes best. Once he starts to see how much women’s clothing costs, he may be a little faster to back down when you challenge the idea that women just don’t need to get equal pay for equal work.
3. Treat him right
Once a relationship is established, be sure to keep up with compliments in public and the encouragement in private. This is also the time to give subtle gifts – like a good shaving set – and suggest that you give him a sexy pedicure.
4. Shift his focus
To preserve your femininity, try to help him see how your interests and his intersect. If he likes football, take him to the ballet. If he likes hunting, sign him up for cooking classes. If he suggests that you should be the one doing the cooking, point him at your muffin.
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