A Mustache Can Be Unbearably Hot. It Can Also Be Appalling.

Let these famous men demonstrate the difference between going back in time to '70s disco, and going back in time to 1940s fascism.


Noah Centineo — 6/10

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Noah Centineo — 6/10
Screenshot: playboycentineo/Twitter

For whatever reason, I’m accursed with the knowledge that in the summer of 2020, while others were baking bread and learning TikTok dances, Noah Centineo tried his hand at growing a mustache. And... it was OK. Nothing to write home about. While I’m not overly enthusiastic about Centineo’s chosen expression for this selfie, like Teller’s ‘stache, I can appreciate the slight mid-part and think he generally has the right face for it.

My main note is that not unlike another feature of the male form, girth and length can make a difference in a mustache, and Centineo’s is on the thinner, wispier side. It’s kind of giving indie art student, but if that’s your vibe, who am I to stop you?

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