AMC Begs Jon Hamm to Put His Penis Away

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While Jon Hamm is known for leaving only one thin layer of clothing between us and him, which has left an indelible large-phallus-shaped imprint on the Internet/cultural landscape/your dreams, AMC is concerned that our more-than-passing acquaintance with his scrote is distracting us from all the Serious Acting that Jon Hamm’s penis has been doing.

During the sixth season filming, Mad Men producers had to “politely” tell Hamm to put underwear on: “This season takes place in the 1960s, where the pants are very tight and leave little to the imagination,” a source tells us, “[and] Jon’s impressive anatomy is so distracting.”

AMC has also taken to Photoshop throughout the series’ run to make Jon Hamm’s dick less prominent in promo shots. It’s the end of an era! A look back, here, and here, and here, and here. And now, military taps, played by Jon Hamm’s dick. [NYDN]

John Mayer and Katy Perry broke up. A source says it was over their schedules, but that seems to be the new de facto bullshit Hollywood excuse these days: “It’s sad. It’s not over until it’s over. You have to see how things play out. She’s leaving the window open. They have both been so focused on work.” Relationships between insipid Cool Whip-bra-spraying pop stars and grade-A douchey singer-songwriters ain’t what they used to be. [MTV News]

Daaaamn, is Naomi Watts accidentally-on-purpose throwing shade at her supposed best friend Nicole Freezyface Kidman?

”Never say never – and I certainly don’t judge anyone who does it. But most of the characters I play are going through some kind of emotional turmoil, so my job requires me to have expression. If my face was froze, what right do I have to play that part? All the women who haven’t done anything to their faces are still able to play great roles. ‘And some of the ones who have done something have messed it up – they look freakish.”

Their next brunch is gonna be awwwwkward. [Contact Music]

Hahah, Gwyneth Paltrow is totally Regina George:

“I feel a sisterhood emerging around me. I’m less threatening now that I’m 40 and not 26-with-an-Oscar. There’s a sense of love and support. I feel really lucky.”

Yeah, I’m sure other women were ESPECIALLY shaking in their boots after you did Shallow Hal. [Us Weekly]

  • Weirdo couple Peter Griffin and Daenerys Targaryen broke up. (He saw her boobs, her dragon ate him.) [L.A. Times]
  • The Today show is courting Maria Shriver. [TMZ]
  • Our buddy Octomom is being investigated for welfare fraud. [TMZ]
  • Lindsay Lohan says that wasn’t Lindsay Lohan partying right after her rehab sentence. [TMZ]
  • Kelsey and Camille Grammer are fighting over their former “marital bed.” [Page Six]
  • Kimye are considering naming their baby North. Which was Kanye’s idea, and which I am ashamed to admit that I would kind of LIKE, except for the fact that it would be “North West,” and, I mean, guhhhh. [Contact Music]
  • And Kim Kardashian might get a tummy tuck post-baby. [Hollywood Life]
  • Beeeecause she is apparently afraid that ‘Ye’s gonna cheat on her. [Radar Online]
  • Victoria Beckham bought a convenience store because because because because because, because of the wonderful things she does. Or whatever. [Heatworld]
  • Bradley Cooper and his new model girlfriend Suki Waterhouse walked around. [Page Six]
  • Kristen Stewart did some tequila shots. [People]
  • Snooki and J-Woww did some breast milk shots. [Gossip Cop]
  • Harmony Korine told Selena Gomez and Vanessa Hudgens to gain weight for Spring Breakers and they went to Taco Bell. [People]
  • Sheryl Crow and her kids with this SEA LION. [People]
  • Gisele Bundchen carried her baby around in a bikini. Newsnewsnewsnews. [Us Weekly]
  • Julianne Hough’s partying was too much for frosted-tip Keebler Elf Ryan Seacrest to handle. [Radar Online]
  • One of the girls from One Tree Hill went out without makeup on. (The only thing I remember about the show was the theme song: I DON’T, WANNA BE, YEEEEAH YEAH.) [Us Weekly]
  • Rumors about Lea Michele’s diva behavior possibly leading to end of Glee have been greatly exaggerated (except I bet she is, in fact, a Mariah-grade diva). [Entertainmentwise]
  • Cissy Houston reportedly begged Dionne Warwick to mentor her troubled granddaughter Bobbi Kristina. [National Enquirer]
  • Rihanna began a concert in Canada two hours late and gave 0.00 fucks about it. [NYDN]
  • Justin Timberlake tells an eight-minute story about his grandparents’ romance as a prelude to the music video for his single “Mirrors.” [Gossip Cop]
  • HBO cancelled Enlightened because people are fucking fools with no taste. [Deadline]
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