Are Hickeys Still a Thing?

Anwar Hadid and Kendall Jenner, two people whom I’m sure you think of often and with fondness, are maybe dating, possibly making out, and potentially marking each other’s thin, sylphlike bodies with a physical representation of their love: the hickey. Yes. Hello. A hickey.

It’s not entirely clear whether or not Anwar Hadid and Kendall Jenner gave each other the hickeys that Elle’s eagle-eye noticed, but one thing is for sure: Anwar, brother of Gigi and Bella, is staging a one-man attempt to bring the hickey back. I applaud whatever lusty ministrations Anwar’s getting into that resulted in this, and I have no intention of shaming anyone for whatever it is they’re into, but I’m fearful that the hickey may be attempting to stage a comeback.

Let’s think this through: a hickey is indicative of “passion,” but it’s also the kind of shit a 16-year-old flaunts in geometry class after making out with their person of choice behind a dumpster on the football field! Maybe there’s something sexy about being marked, though I’d argue that it’s even sexier if said mark is on the body in a place that is not visible to the casual passerby. A neck hickey is not a fate I’d wish on anyone; there are only so many ways one can jauntily tie a scarf without looking like a freshly-groomed shih-tzu.

Mark me elsewhere, if you must (and I consent, you jerk!), but if there is a hickey on my neck, I will make you suffer.