Disney Parks to Introduce Computerized Bracelet to Track Your Every Move, Er, to, Uh, 'Make Your Visit More Convenient'
LatestDisney, having already revolutionized the way monkeys wear vests, has continued to advance into the future, this time by introducing a new method of ticketing at Disney Parks & Resorts. In the next few months, customers will be offered MyMagic+, a special management system that allows park goers to bypass ticketing turnstiles, be alerted to when ride lines are shortest, and pay for park merchandise all through a computerized wrist band programmed with a credit card number and selected personal information.
“If we can enhance the experience, more people will spend more of their leisure time with us,” said Disney Parks and Resorts’ jovial-seeming chairman Thomas O. Staggs in an interview with the New York Times. (His smile, large and unsettling, fell immediately upon hanging up with the reporter. “And the more of their leisure time that they spend with us, the more they will be ours,” he added in a dead, cold whisper. A jolt of electricity flickered behind his eyes. Thomas O. Staggs is a robot.)