Emails I Have Received This Week About #Benghazi, Ranked

By Anna Merlan | October 26, 2015 | 8:35pm

Politics

On Friday, I had an opinion about why the Benghazi and Planned Parenthood hearings haven’t gone especially well for the Republican members of Congress hosting them. The good thing about having an opinion on the internet is that someone is always on hand to explain why it’s wrong.

Here are the emails I received about that story, ranked from least to most essential. (Five of these emails were from men, while two were from women. We’ll let the details of the gender breakdown remain a mystery.)

7 (Least)

It’s reflective of how clever the name is that a savvy reporter such as yourself doesn’t notice that in:

“the State Department, the intelligence community, the Defense Department, the White House”

You’ve made a capitalization error. The Intelligence Community is in fact a government entity, and requires capitalization.

http://www.dni.gov/index.php/inte…

You see, apparently the Obama administration decided that the DHS wasn’t “meta” enough, and we needed even more egregious data sharing.

But no one noticed because they gave it such a wishy-washy name that it sounds like something that you just say in conversation.

Enjoy!

I did make a capitalization error, but the Intelligence Community isn’t its own governmental entity. It’s the name for 17 governmental entities, including the CIA, the FBI, the Coast Guard, the Drug Enforcement Administration, the National Security Agency and others. We can’t blame President Obama for the creation of any of those agencies, although he sure didn’t help.

6

OK.

5

That one goes on for a while, but I’m suddenly getting tired.

4

This one was an excellent one-two punch of subject line and email.

One:

Two:

(ISIS was not created by Hillary Clinton or the United States, nor did she orchestrate the deaths of four people to cover up her dastardly scheme. ISIS was not behind the attack in Benghazi, although one of the suspects believed to have helped plan the attack, Ali Awni al-Harzi, was later killed in a U.S.-led airstrike on Islamic State targets near Mosul, Iraq.)

3

There were at least several Republican women on that committee, so I think it’s a farce to make this about men versus women. It’s the Republican party vs. Hillary, sure, but gender politics ? Eh.

Oh.

2

1

It appears my story was actually foolish, indicative of the twin scourges of lesbianism and feminism. I would like to extend my sincere apologies at this time to Guido M. of Santa Rosa, John Herbert Sullivan (who cc:ed himself on his own email) and the American people.

Contact the author at [email protected].
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Hillary Clinton during her testimony before the House Benghazi Committee, October 22, 2015. Photo via AP Images