Gay Penguins End Their Relationship

The zoo moved the two lovebirds (had to) away from each other and set them each up with a female companion, in hopes that the two endangered species would mate. Buddy almost immediately took up “breeding behavior” with a lady penguin named Farai — but poor brokenhearted Pedro has yet to conform to the Zoo’s wishes. You can’t just push the gay away, zookeepers. That Marcus Bachmann shit ain’t gonna fly, not with Pedro.