• Police in Nigeria are holding a goat in custody on suspicion of attempted armed robbery. Vigilantes turned the beast in, claiming it was a robber who used black magic to transform himself. •
• 3 are dead and 12 wounded after a man in Belgium went on a rampage in a daycare center. The suspect is a local man with a history of mental illness. • Ugh: America apparently has its own Joseph Fritzl. A rural Missouri man is facing charges for the murder of at least one of the four children he has fathered with his now-19 year old daughter. • Even Girl Scout cookies are feeling the harsh bite of the recession: due to costs, several kinds of cookies were recently re-sized (which sadly includes thin mints). • A controversial art exhibit in London has been charged with violating decency laws. The project is a “make your own Maddy McCann porn,” and encourages visitors to paste images of the missing toddler onto pornographic images. • A pair of lions from the Gaza Zoo were some of the only animals to survive the recent attacks, and are now expecting cubs. • An Iowa woman has been arrested for failure to return a library book. The book in question is valued at $13.95. • Following Pepsi, Starbucks has decided to cash in on the Obama image, with this ad, which copies an Obama video down to the music. • George Anthony, grandfather to murdered toddler Caylee Anthony, is being held on suicide watch, and faces psychiatric evaluation after leaving a five page suicide note in the family car. • A new study has found that out of women who IM their partner, the ones who used the pronoun “I” a lot are happier than those who used “we.” • On a recent survey, more than half of the respondents looking after a relative with dementia admitted to mistreating their ward. Most of the reported abuse was verbal, but 3 of the 220 people questioned copped to physical abuse as well. • Pakistani newlyweds Pervez Chachar and Humera Kambo are currently living in the local police headquarters out of fear of their families. Chachar and Kambo were from rival tribes, and Chachar’s family believes that they are honor bound to kill his wife. • Mattel Inc is set to introduce several new toys for 2009, including the creepy-sounding “Elmo Tickle Hands.” The “hands” are furry red gloves that vibrate and laugh when they touch flesh. • Black students may be preforming better in school this week because of the “Obama effect,” a study says. • More change! The Obama administration is expected to reopen the Statue of Liberty’s crown to visitors. • Click here to learn 10 random facts about Dr. Seuss stories. • New research has found that drinking three cups of tea a day could slash the risk of breast cancer by 37%. • Feeling overwhelmed? Read this story about Adwai Madual, a single mother of quintuplets, and suddenly your end of the week workload won’t seem so bad. • And if that doesn’t work, here’s a slide show that documents the medical history of circumcision. Did you know only 50% of U.S. males were circumcised in 2008? • And finally, a slide show of the top ten gay movies. Unsurprisingly, “Brokeback Mountain” is number one. •