Reader Roundup: Missing Dog Found Battling Laser Cats
LatestRaise a glass to today’s best comments.
• Best Comment Of The Day in response to Couple Offers To Name Baby After Whoever Finds Their Dog:
The dog probably had to go across the universe to fight crime with her incredible laser eyes.
• Best Comment Of The Day in response to Pregnant Lady Booted From Bar For Totally Innane Reason:
Of all the gin joints, in all the towns, in all the world, the fetus walks into mine.
• Best Comment Of The Day in response to Big Style At “Big Love”:
My great aunt Myrtle got married in Ginnifer Goodwin’s dress. It was 1981. I was 9. The dress what God-awful then. And still is today.
I loved my Aunt Myrtle, but let’s be honest, it was her third marriage and this one was to a man with whom she’d previously had an affair. An affair, it was said, that brought on his wife’s cancer, which ultimately killed her, leaving him free to marry my aunt and give her an opportunity to go to Leggett’s Dept. Store and buy this dress. So, you see, this dress is not good on any level.
• Best Comment Of The Day in response to Homophobes Gracefully Cancel Plans To Picket Tucson Girl’s Funeral:
I want to get a job in Heaven working at the pearly gates just so I can see these nutjobs get in.
WBC: “Yeah, we’re here to hang out with Jesus. He’s totally expecting us”
Me: “I’m sorry; I don’t see your name on this list. Let me call him over”
Jesus: “Who the hell are these crazy people? They’re not getting in heaven! Have you seen how much evil they’ve done?!?”
WBC: “But…no, Jesus we did it all for you! It was all for youuuuu!”
Jesus: “Nope, you did it all because you wanted people to believe in your way. You twisted a holy text of love and forgiveness into a hateful thing of anger and blame. Enjoy the flames down under! JC OUT!”
And then the WBC cries the whole down on the escalator to hell. It would be awesome.
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