Oh England, who delighted America so thoroughly with her eight-month-long wedding blow-out, whose pompous hats we secretly envy but look really really good on her, who wears pantyhose but day drinks, who throws massive shade in the form of a 19-foot-tall balloon and shrugs, who has a birthday party for nana but then jumps out on the dance floor and is all like “girrll let’s get loose!!”, who wears lime green to a wedding and makes it work, who calls her vagina a “fanny” and blogs about it on mumsnet, who adopted our girlfriend Meg and was really quite nice to our friend Kelly and who is basically our new best friend because we need one. And she’s been kinda depressed lately, too, so she can relate.