So Claire's Is Hawking A Pretty Phallic Cell Phone Charm

By Anna Breslaw  |  October 27, 2012 | 6:00pm
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An intrepid tipster (thanks, Jen!) has alerted us to one particular item in Claire’s, that shopping-mall bastion of cheapo headbands and Best Friend necklaces favored by Youngs across America. Top your cell phone with this adorable mustache charm, suggests the description for this rather familiar-shaped charm. Look closely, and perhaps you too will note that it appears to have contraception, which is admittedly a good subliminal lesson for kids to learn.

Without ado, an excerpt from Judy Blume’s Forever:

In books [mustache cell phone charms] are always described as hot and throbbing but his [mustache cell phone charm] felt like ordinary skin. Just the shape was different-that and the fact that he wasn’t smooth, exactly-as if there was a lot going on under the skin. I don’t know why I’d been so nervous about touching his [mustache cell phone charm]. Once I got over being scared I let my hands go everywhere. I wanted to feel every part of his [mustache cell phone charm.]

 
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