Weddings, why do people have them? They’re typically very expensive and, not to get all Carrie Bradshaw about it, one shouldn’t have to get married to get their general personhood or longterm relationship validated with a shower of gifts and money from loved ones. Or, in the case of one serial scammer, just steal the shower of gifts and money right out from the noses of the newly married couple!
A serial wedding crasher is wanted in south-central Texas for showing up at weddings and stealing the gifts, all while posing as a guest. “Let’s not let her ruin anyone else’s special day and bring this crasher to justice,” the Comal County sheriff’s office told CNN. There’s currently a $4,000 reward being offered for any information about the case.
I’m currently offering no reward, but if you’re this woman or regularly crash weddings I want to hear how the hell you do it. Who do you pose as, the cousin’s freshmen roommate? Where do you sit? How long do you stay? How do you know which gifts to go for? I have too many questions.