Wanna Feel Old? Billie Eilish

“Like a Sour Patch Kid?” she asked. Yes! Well, more like a Garbage Pail Kid, technically, but a Garbage Pail Kid was like a Cabbage Patch Kid. It’s a rather intricate lineage, you see.

Some other things Eilish didn’t know: Who Huey Lewis is (fair), the name of a Ghostbuster (fine), and what not to do to a gremlin (a mogwai, actually) after midnight (potentially devastating). Kimmel asked her to fill in the blank of “Run-D.M…” and she said, “What? What is that?” She’s never seen The Cosby Show, and I guess she never will.

“You makin’ me look so dumb,” said Eilish, employing the apparent blaccent that she occasionally dips into in interviews. One day we should talk about that. Anyway, she may have failed the test but she’s winning at life because she is young and on television and her music is actually good. Congratulations all around.