Whatever, Drake Wasn't That Into Her Anyway, Okay?

CelebritiesDirt Bag
Whatever, Drake Wasn't That Into Her Anyway, Okay?

Good morning, as the world continues to grind itself into dust, at least celebrities can still perform downright operatic choreographies of love and rejection in the space of a week. The way I understand it–and I have no doubt you, dear commenter, will tell me how I’ve gravely misunderstood the situation—some weeks ago rumors indicated that recently unattached celebrity Kylie Jenner and former Degrassi star Drake were maybe, possibly, perhaps, dating: Jenner appeared at a few events with the Canadian singer and several “sources with knowledge” speculated that while the pair didn’t dance together or anything, there was definitely some “energy” in the room. Yesterday, friends of the celestially doomed couple placed some quotes in Page Six insisting this was a totally platonic situation, and that while the two briefly flirted and maybe had a “romantic relationship” over the last month, they weren’t planning on becoming a couple.

Jenner’s friends said she was wary of Drake’s reputation as a “womanizer.” (“She’s smarter than that,” said one.) Today, the saga continues: Someone who was definitely not a representative of Drake’s gave a piping hot EXCLUSIVE to HollywoodLife claiming that while the rather skeevy Canadian definitely thought Jenner was “hot,” he declined to date her out of respect for the family and a longstanding appreciation for their deep and lasting friendship. Sounds legit! [Hollywood Life]

I understand than when you have an estimated net worth of $35 million it might be hard to feel truly well. You’ve done the sensory deprivation chamber, the Carnivore Diet, the clandestine transfusion of teenaged plasma straight into your bloodstream. Sometimes, it might be tempting to try something really crazy, something extreme to make you feel truly alive. Maybe you have visions of Apollo’s light streaming into your body, forging a man into a god. But I’m sorry, even being as charitable as all that, what an absolute moron, bless Josh Brolin and his sunburned ass:

  • The Tennessee AG has filed documents accusing Bachelor in Paradise star Evan Bass of lying about every conceivable aspect of his men’s health clinic. [TMZ]
  • Cats are weird and Taylor Swift friggin loves Cats, as the singer told Andrew Lloyd Webber in Vogue. [Page Six]
  • Something rather inscrutable is happening between Caitlin Jenner and Khloe Kardashian. [TMZ]
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