Demi Moore & A Giraffe Have A Fashion Orgasm With Rachel Zoe

By Dodai Stewart | August 4, 2010 | 4:00pm

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So. I was forced to watch a show I’d never seen before, The Rachel Zoe Project. As far as I can tell, someone died? Rachel dramatically said stuff like, “Taylor was everything to me.” And: “My heart is broken. Broken.”

Okay, okay, Taylor’s not dead. She got fired for doing shady stuff. (Maybe? Who knows what her side of the story is?) But the flashback videos made it seem like she was in heaven. Rachel lost her blessed jewel!

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Having never watched this show, I asked my friend Tim about it, and he informed me that there are 5 basic plotlines and one standard ending.
1. The dress isn’t here yet, what are we going to do?
2. Someone might be wearing the same dress, what are we going to do?
3. Chanel is to die for.
4. Rachel is working too hard, has vertigo and is going to die, what are we going to do?
5. Minion wars.
The end result is that everything works out okay and the photograph/celebrity looks AH. MAY. ZING.

File this under: Things that do not happen to me when I am working. No one carries me anywhere. No one.

This is how we were introduced to the giraffe who starred in Demi Moore‘s Bazaar shoot.

Last but not least: Rachel teaches us what a “moment” is. Then, UHHH. UHHH. UHHH. Fashion orgasm.