Don't Fuck With Tayshia Adams

Don't Fuck With Tayshia Adams
Screenshot:ABC/The Bachelorette (Fair Use)

Hello Bachelor Nation! We’re back this holiday week after a brief cessation, but that’s all fine and good: the covid-chaotic season has officially reached the halfway mark, which makes it as good a time as ever to reflect on the current moment. Week six began with Tayshia, now the second black Bachelorette in franchise history, testing the boys’ “grown-ass man” abilities in a makeshift school run by Bachelor success story Ashley Iaconetti and Jared Haibon. They were quizzed, Are You Smarter Than A Fifth Grader?-style, forced to play tug-of-war, and made to serve Tayshia breakfast in bed. Ed—who I only know as the man that host Chris Harrison called a “meat head” before the season even began—lost, and was labeled a “man-child.” Bennett, the Harvard grad who loves to remind everyone that is a Harvard grad, won the title of “grown-ass man.” Gender studies academics reading this, please, have a fucking field day!

The remainder of the cocktail party involved men criticizing one another for behaving in a way that was not in line with their personal definitions of being “grown-ass men.” Tayshia made a comment about really liking Ben, no doubt foreshadowing that he will be one of the last men standing (quote me on it!). Ed approached Tayshia and said Chasen is only there for Instagram followers after he said Ed had “chicken legs.” She sat all the contestants down and reminded them that she’s looking for a husband at the end of this, so they all need to get their shit together. Ivan got the rose. At the rose ceremony, the Ed versus Chasen debate continues. Instead of telling them to go home, she sent Montel, Peter, and Jay packing. I suppose because they did not create enough drama.

The next day, another group date took place: Tayshia had the guys duke it out—literally WWE-style—and Chasen and Ed were pitted against each other. Masculinity is a prison! They fought and the mustached Noah—who was not on the date, and has only been known as the guy with a mustache at this point—jumped in the ring. He let Tayshia shave off his questionable facial hair, and for some reason, that inspired her to give him a rose.

Masculinity is a prison.

Week seven begins with a group date: half the guys are instructed to write a love song for Tayshia, despite having no musical or creative talent. Ivan wins the one-on-one date, solely for asking her to sit close to him after performing a weird, spoken-word, almost rap. Because they are still in quarantine, the date is movie night and room service, an adult game of The Floor Is Lava, a pillow fight, a game of Twister. It’s sweet, they make out; they discuss race and biracial identity—something that has never before been touched upon on the show—and he gets a rose. Meanwhile, the remaining contestants compete in a game of “Tayshia’s Truth or Dare” with some help from Sydney Lotuaco from Pilot Peter’s season of The Bachelor as well as The Bachelorette’s Becca Kufrin, sans her ex-fiancé Garrett ‘Blue Lives Matter’ Yrigoyen. Some men are tasked with “proposing” to Tayshia; others fake orgasms for all to hear. At the after-party, Zac C, who is not not bootleg Nick Viall, gets the rose. Ben, who failed to reach out to Tayshia in the time allotted, visited her in the middle of the night. They smooch. Ed attempted to do the same, but ended up in Chris Harrison’s room instead. They drink together.

The following day, the cocktail party is interrupted by former-mustache Noah, who tells Tayshia the rest of the men think she only gave him a rose to incite infighting. She’s upset by the assumed accusation that she’s not there for the right reasons (there is no more recurring trope in the series) and gives them a talking to—sans drinks. Joe, Chasen, Kenny and Jordan C. are all sent home, which is good news, because Chasen is the worst. They’re dropping like flies!

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