Have You Seen This 'Put Your Number in My Phone' Prank?

First of all, not a “prank.” Not a “prank.” How is this a “prank.” Explain. I would have put “prank” in sarcastic quotation marks in the headline, but I had to put “Put Your Number in My Phone” in actual quotation marks and it screwed up my whole sarcasm thing and BOY AM I UNHAPPY ABOUT IT. Because this is technically just a video of dudes asking for girls’ numbers. Not a prank. A prank would have been handing them your phone and asking them to type their number in and then—psych!—the phone is actually a turd! And then you hit them in their lady-nuts with a rake or whatever and for some reason Dax Shepard is there. [All laugh.] That would be a prank. THIS IS NOT A PRANK. JUST USE WORDS FOR WHAT THEY MEAN.

Anyway, what’s notable about this video (and I use the term “notable” based solely on the level of internet chatter) is that the dudes don’t actually ask for girls’ numbers—they order the girls to give them their numbers. And the girls do. Specifically, it’s two nonthreatening, non-gross, confident, Macklemore-looking white dudes instructing 18-year-old girls on the BYU campus to “put your number in my phone.” And the girls are all, “What? Oh, okay,” and it’s basically SEX MAGIC. To me that seems like the most non-notable thing of all time, but…consider your minds freaked, I guess.

Two thoughts:

1. I can’t believe I’m saying this, but in the scheme of things, this is actually kind of a not-bad way to get asked out. It’s over in two seconds, there’s no corny small-talk or whining or awful pre-rehearsed scripts, and it has the allure of procrastination. “I find you attractive. If it’s mutual, just put your number in here and we’ll figure this shit out later. Now I will leave you alone. Goodbye.” And if you’re not into it, it’s brazen and irritating enough that you’d be justified in giving a side-eye-laden “Nope!” and striding off to Kinesiology with nary a second thought.

2. That said, I really, really hope this doesn’t become the new Harlem Shake, because it’s a super-fine line to walk and I have a feeling that almost nobody could actually pull it off. Ladies don’t need every pouty PUA in America ordering them around while they’re trynna get to class. To illustrate that point, I put together this video simulation of how the “Put Your Number in My Phone” method might play out IRL:

Yeah, no. Not worth it, bros.