Justin Bieber Ordered to Undergo Anger Management, Stop Being a Dick

By Mark Shrayber | August 13, 2014 | 8:50pm

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Crime-fighting rodent Justice Beaver is about to get a little more adorable and a little less “misunderstood ruffian” because he’ll soon be going through his first (and hopefully last) round of anger management classes in connection to that one time he did drag racing and got caught.

Bieber’s lawyer, who will appear on the pop star’s behalf, is expected to accept a plea deal that will include Bieber taking 12 hours of private anger management classes (godspeed, anger management instructor), watching videos of real life DUI stories (is this like Red Asphalt?), paying court fines and making a charitable donation to the tune of $50,ooo, according to The Miami Herald. In return, Florida will drop the DUI charge against Bieber so he won’t be facing any jail time (one less thing he’ll have in common with Paris Hilton!). And he’ll have more time to go back on tour, spit on fans (such a bad boy), and pee on shit he isn’t meant to. Everyone wins? (Except that one lawyer who asked Bieber about Selena Gomez, because he told you to never mention Selena. He told you!)